A tribute to a once special someone...lessons drawn

My nose hehehe

........someone mentions cute nose in a random comment and recollections of how you would always tease me about “our” kids inheriting my “ugly” nose flood my mind. I can’t help but smile this time. 

For a moment my mind wanders...far-off the Germany Vs Argentina world cup final...yes am set out to watch the whole match this once. But now, can’t shake the desire to scribble something about/for you.

My smile develops into a chuckle because i just reminisced about how you would call from the hills somewhere just to sing for me. It was always a chorus of the same local song that you love so much. You may not have the best voice but it was special! Whenever that call came through, i would vanish from my desk like a teenager in her haste to speak to a first love. The knowledge that it was also a song for you and my best friend didn’t change how i felt each time you sang it to me. YOU SANG IT TO ME!!!

Oh no.....i hate this part right here.....offside? Thought it was a legit goal! What went wrong? What does it mean when the line’s man cancels a goal like that? I realize i still have a very long way to go to catch up on this sport. Am that clueless!

My dear once special one, you said i was the reason we couldn’t work out; that i would say one thing but do another; i never learned to choose; i put too much brain in love. Thinking things out like a chess game. Creating scenarios; playing them out and in the process suffocating love's artistic nature. 

But frankly, i did not find reason enough to transform; to show how i truly felt about you. You just never gave me any motive to. As the saying goes “it takes two to tangle...”.

The closest you ever got to “saying anything” was “You are not the most beautiful girl; you don’t have a butt so big; you may not smile so good; but still, here we are Ella. That must mean something.....right?” Yes, having you in my life meant something...actually alot. You stuck around even when i was horrendous and indistinct about “us”. You stayed! 

It’s crazy how i would drive you to the edge with my obstinacy. “Ella you know it irks me when you opt to text about important things....”our” things which should be talked about face-to-face...”. I would then apologise but do it again anyway. And then out of exasperation you would go like “oh boy...!”. But you were there still. Even when you said i was a schemer and all..even when i rejected you several times, you stayed!

If only you talked to me; met me half way! But with you it always had to be me expressing myself and all.

Phew! Mario Gotze finally sets the bar. Germany 1: Argentina 0. Match has been so exasperating!

Goodlyfe’s  ballad Ekyaama (our hills/calls' song) chooses to resonate now of all times from the Health Club opposite my place! Hmmm...seems like even God wants me to keep missing you! 

In the recent past, thinking about you, missing you and anything linked to you would only bring me pain, sadness and an assortment of negative sentiments. But now, it all comes with a grin of contentment. I savour every thought! Even with the realisation that what we had meant little or zilch to you, i still smile. “We” existed, doesn’t matter what you make the world believe. You are enigmatic like that! 

One of my all-time favourite ballads plays on Radio One “.....i will give anything...and everything to fall in love...just this one time, i would like to find, what i’ve been dreaming of....” (RIP Gerald Levert) and am thinking to myself...i hoped i had found this in you! 

But oh well, like you always said, we live and learn! I have since chosen to regard “us” as a lesson well deserved/learned.

The Human Resource Officer at my workplace every daybreak sends to all our emails an inspirational piece and today’s just spoke right to my heart. I thought i would share with everyone out there.

 

Here goes, 

“There are people who can walk away from you. And hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you: let them walk. I don't want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone. When people can walk away from you let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left. People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them stay.

Let them go!

And it doesn't mean that they are a bad person; it just means that their part in the story is over. And you've got to know when people's parts in your story are over so that you don't keep trying to raise the dead. You've got to know when they are “dead”.

You've got to know when it's over; 'cause whatever God means for you to have He'll give it to you. And if it takes too much sweat you don't need it. Stop begging people to stay. 

Let them go!!”

So my precious, thanks for the time we spent together. It may not have been that long but i will always cherish “our moments”. You may have selective amnesia and as such not remember, but “we” existed! And you can be really sweet when you want to. I loved every waking moment of it all. Thank you!

I hope life treats you kind. I wish you lots of joy and happiness. And i hope and pray that you achieve all your heart’s desires. But above all this, i wish you love (I know i sound like Whitney Houston right now; may her soul RIP...but these are the exact words i want to say to you...hehehe)

Goodbye my beloved.

                                                                                                      

*Wait a second, any more goals??? Damn...totally forgot about the match!*